Saturday, October 11, 2008

 

Terms of Battle, 2008-2009

Here are the new Terms of Battle. If we missed anything, let us know. We bumped some terms off because they are no longer in common usage, but they are still available for viewing in the archived Terms of Battle. Those can be accessed at the bottom of this post or in the sidebar on the main page.




Term: The Oilogosphere
Definition: The world-wide collection of Oilers blogs. Coined by Mudcrutch.



Nickname: A group of the all-time greatest guys in Edmonton history
Also Known As: The Edmonton Investors Group, the EIG. Coined by Terry Jones.



Term: Folks on the #8 Bus
Definition: The everyday, average Oilers fan.



Nickname: Scorcoff
Also Known As: Shawn Horcoff. Believed to be coined by Gary B.



Term: Levels of Hugeness
Definition: A rating system of Big Games, Huge Games, Big Goals, Huge Goals, Big Saves, and Huge Saves.



Nickname: Saint Fernando
Also Known As: Fernando Pisani, 34, San Fernando, My Cousin Fernando Pisani, Pantsani, The Patron Saint of Lost Hockey Causes.



Nickname: The Greenwich Village of Western Canada
Also Known As: Downtown Edmonton, once it has a new hockey arena. Coined by Mark Rosentraub.



Term: Crosby
Definition: Crosby. May be substituted for any Crosby, CROSBY, crosby, Crosby, Crosby, or Crosby!



Term: HORCOFF AND DIE!!!
Definition: Celebrating a goal by Shawn Horcoff. Coined by Lowetide.



Nickname: Dick as a Watch
Also Known As: Kyle Brodziak.



Nickname: Glengarry Glencross
Also Known As: Curtis Glencross, GlenX. Coined by Vic Ferrari.



Nickname: Mr. Glass
Also Known As: Ethan Moreau, Chopper.



Term: Strong, muscular legs
Definition: Preposterous and masturbatory praise for an NHL hockey player.



Nickname: Gilbert Gilbert
Also Known As: Tom Gilbert, Brad Gilbert.



Term: The Global Urban Food Chain (GUFC)
Definition: The Global Urban Food Chain, obviously. Coined by Dan Mason.



Term: Garnage
Definition: A bad call. Coined by Mike W.



Term: Cowbells
Definition: Factors that coaches and GMs foreground and elevate above and beyond their true values. Coined by Kent W.



Term: In The Midst
Definition: Exaggerating a streak to either the benefit of your team or the detriment of their opponents/rivals.



Nickname: Goddamn these injurioesa=asdnmlkSNn jk
Definition: Frustrating Oilers injuries. Coined by Mike W.



Term: Colin Campbell Wheel of Justice
Definition: The method by which the length of NHL suspensions is determined. Coined by Rob Kerr, made famous by Matt Fenwick.



Term: Why downtown? It has to be downtown.
Definition: The argument for a downtown arena. Now applied to any situation using the simple formula, "Why X? It has to be X." Coined by the Leadership Committee for a New Sports/Entertainment Facility for Edmonton.



Term: Gagner West
Also Known As: Sam Gagner, Master Samwise, Proudfoot Proudfeet!. Coined by Colby Cosh.



Nickname: Hobo Terrorists
Also Known As: Downtown Edmontonians.



Term: EMPIRACAL FACT
Definition: Undeniable hockey truths.



Nickname: Literally. Crush.
Also Known As: Rexall Place.



Term: (spits)
Definition: Disgust at uttering the words, "Calgary" and "Flames," especially during the playoffs. Coined by Pleasure Motors.



Term: Le
Definition: Adding the French "the" to anything you say so as to make it sound more poetic, poignant and Canadian. Coined by Le Loxy.



Term: Gritness
Definition: Lots of grit. Coined by TSN.



Nickname: Joffrey Zoolander
Also Known As: Joffrey Lupul.



Term: The Most Exciting Play In Hockey
Definition: A Flames empty-net goal, serving to further pad their statistical offensive dominance over the Oilers. Now broadened out to mean all empty-net goals scored by the Oilers or Flames. Coined by Vic Ferrari.



Nickname: The Hockey Jesus
Also Known As: Robbie Schremp, Robimus Prime, Popcorn, Sugartits



Nickname: Le GG
Also Known As: Georges Laraque, Georges, Georgie, BG. Coined by Mike W.



Nickname: The Mock Turtle
Also Known As: Bill Butler.



Nickname: Jarmoe
Also Known As: Jarome Iginla.



Nickname: Anonymouse
Definition: Any cowardly commenter who drops in, says something stupid or insulting, but doesn't sign in under a real or assumed name. Perfectly visualized by Mike W.



Term: Stempniaked
Definition: To be unexpectedly defeated by the singular efforts of an until then unknown player on a sub-standard team (spectacular art by Chris de Groat here).



Term: Vaunted/The Vaunt
Definition: The Oilers offence. Coined by Peter.



Term: Blender
Definition: Craig MacTavish's propensity for mixing and changing linemates.



Term: GOILERS!
Definition: Go Oilers!






Archives

Terms of Battle, 2005-2006
Terms of Battle, 2006-2007
Terms of Battle, 2007-2008

Comments:

Did the Torres Blindspot get the axe like Torres himself?
 


Fabulous!
Always excellent to post the Terms of Battle before the season gets rolling.
 


i think the peter forsberg hattrick has historical, if not current, significance and is the best term of battle anyone has ever come up with.
 


Ah, it's good to be back.

Why is it good to be back?

Because it has to be good to be back.
 


Did the Torres Blindspot get the axe like Torres himself?

i think the peter forsberg hattrick has historical, if not current, significance and is the best term of battle anyone has ever come up with.

All the terms are still available in the old Terms of Battle, and I'm happy to bring them back. I just tried to keep the most recent and most usable ones in the current edition.
 


All the terms are still available in the old Terms of Battle, and I'm happy to bring them back. I just tried to keep the most recent and most usable ones in the current edition.

I would love a leather-bound edition for Xmas, if you can swing it.
 


I would love a leather-bound edition for Xmas, if you can swing it.


perhaps an audio book version, lovingly read by Gene Principe (music, SFX, production, design, assembly, packaging & sales by Toby Petersen)?
 


I would love a leather-bound edition for Xmas, if you can swing it.

Don't tempt me.
 


I also know we used the terms "Vice Pisani" and "Boys on the Bus" last year, but I don't know why. I think we named someone the Vice Pisani, and used Boys on the Bus in the same way we used Crosby. Anyone?
 


Every year these get trotted out and every year they remain just as lame.
 


I think this should be added, personally.

Term: "Best of luck to the Calgary Flames this season/post-season."
Translation: Something like this.
Coined by: Lowetide, I think. Maybe Black Dog. Can't remember offhand.
 


I see anonymouse has already proven the definition with such brevity.
 


Every year these get trotted out and every year they remain just as lame.

Lyle Best is back.
 


Dammit, the nickname "Phrankeneuf" didn't make the cut.

You look at Dion for 30 seconds and tell me he isn't two neck-bolts short of being straight out of the mind of Mary Shelley with a straight face....
 


There should be an entry for Bertuzzi there somewhere. He, compared to so many other Falmes deserves one.
 


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