Tuesday, December 11, 2007


I'm not a pervert! I was just looking for a Turbo Man doll!

Anyone have any good Christmas shopping stories to tell? My favorite so far concerns the lady in the Zellers with me on Monday. We were in the toy section--specifically, boardgames. I'm doing my thing, checking out the merch, and out of the corner of my eye I suddenly see this copy of Cranium Hoopla hit the floor. Cruella de Scrooge had bumped into a display, and knocked one box down. But rather than pick up the box which she herself had just knocked down, Her Wickedness kicked it. Yes, kicked it. Not hard. Not far. But she kicked it. Like it was a dead mouse and she was checking to see if it was faking. And then--and here's where it gets good--she looked over at me, shook her head, and walked away. Shook her head. At me. To me. Like we were both witness to some horrible crime done upon her by the non-animated box of goodness. I was so stunned by her audaciousness that I didn't even say anything to her. And, I regret to say, I was so scared of her that I didn't even pick the game up. I went over and verified that the display wasn't ridiculously overstocked (it wasn't), and then slinked away, an unwilling accomplice to her horrible Christmas crime. Poor Hoopla never had a chance with that monster. Me neither.


The horror.

What is it about Christmas that brings out the beast in people? Or perhaps the more appropriate questions is "What is it about Zellers that brings out the beast in people"?

Or perhaps more accurately, the Hudson's Bay Company, since my mom (who works at the Bay here in Calgary) deals with that exact person at least 10 times a day this season.

Zellers at Christmas is truly a very special occasion. I had the distinct pleasure of working there for 3 years while finishing college. I started as a cashier and got promoted to the customer service desk. That's where you meet the most fascinating and entertaining people...and the name calling and swearing all happen in the name of Christmas spirit..

During my University days, I worked at the Chinook center Starbucks in Calgary.

You haven't truly experienced the absurdity, neuroses or stupidity of the general public until you've worked at a Starbucks in a major mall at Christmas time.

Unfortunately (or fortunately), I can no longer tease a particularly bad memory from that mass of miserable hours anymore. It's all settled into a blur of tears and steam and burns and pain.

WalMart the other day - turned up an isle and an older lady was turning up the other end of it. As we got close to meeting each other moved my cart to the right and she looked right at me - I said hello and smiled - and she continued down the isle until she came to my cart (on the right side already up against the display) she's right in the middle and stopped directly in front of me and wouldn't move over. I backed up and turned around and had to go around on the next isle.

Then I get to the checkout in time to see another grown woman berating the 14 year old checkout girl for the price being wrong on her 29 cent socks.

God I love shopping at christmas.

I own Hoopla.. lots of fun.

I got a copy of Catch Phrase: Music Edition. Hoping to bust it out on New Years, if not sooner.

I started as a cashier and got promoted to the customer service desk.
Um, that wasn't a promotion....

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