Tuesday, November 29, 2005

 

Trouble in paradise?

Exclusive report: must credit Battle of Alberta

While most of the city is bundled up to enjoy the Grey Cup victory parade, it's not all ham and plaques in Edmonton. A source close to the Oilers has forwarded me this transcript of a very tense exchange from the Oil's team meal after their morning skate:
Morrison: Hey! What the hell is this, Laraque?
Laraque: It's a bol of shau-dere, Michel.
Morrison: Wait a minute, come here. What did you call it? Say it loud enough so everyone can hear. Come on, say it...
Laraque: Ahem. Shau-dere.
Morrison: [raucous laughter] Shau-dere? Shau-dere? It's "chow-dah". Say it right!
Laraque: [pause] Shaudear.
Morrison: [laughter] Come back here! I'm not through demeaning you.
Laraque: I send you back to Greenville dans une boite, p'tit merde...

Morrison's condition is not presently known, although he is still tapped as the Oilers' starting goalie tonight.

Related info here: the header gave me a good five-minute laugh. And if none of this makes any sense, clearly you haven't heard a Mike Morrison interview.

Comments:

kudos for the more subtle "ham and plaques" Simpsons reference.
 


I'm just not real sure why anyone would be "bundling up" for a Grey Cup victory parade that is taking place entirely indoors.
 


"I'm just not real sure why anyone would be "bundling up" for a Grey Cup victory parade that is taking place entirely indoors."

Well, Edmonton fans ARE quite stupid.
 


Oh snap! "Edmonton fans are stupid!" Does Larry David help you with the word-verification filter when he's not writing your zingers for you?
 


What can I tell you? My research into the Grey Cup celebration was cancelled due to lack of interest.

And Edmonton fans are not dumb (at least the ones who were born there--I can't account for Sacamano). The men are pasty, and the women have bruises on their legs, but they are not dumb.
 


Jeez, did I hit a nerve?

Unfortunately, not everyone has all day to mull over and reword their award-winning and repetitious male enhancement joke.

Maybe you could expand on it a little and create something out of the arena the Flames will be playing in tonight. Hilarity will be sure to ensue.
 


Ha! But is there really a way to make "Gaylord Entertainment Centre" funnier? I'm skeptical.
 


"The parade ended in a food court where the players were introduced individually to the fans."

Man, Edmonton does know how to celebrate, doesn't it.
 


The TSN report notes 25,000 fans in attendence. How many were in attendence today for the Stampeders Grey Cup victory? And can you remind me how many showed up for the Flames 2nd Stanley Cup victory celebration? I can't remember.

I am off the the Oilers game. Long live the Exeter grad!
 


I didn't think the intellect of the Edmonton fans really needed to be defended, seeing as they actually own the Eskimos. I guess Calgarians figure we don't come up to the calibre of intellectual giants like Michael Feterik. But attacking our party-organizing abilities is just hitting us at our strongest point; I only wish the actual team was as successful every year as the Spirit of Edmonton room.
 

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