The Midnight Special

They had not gone far before they saw the Mock Turtle in the distance, sitting sad and lonely on a little ledge of rock, and, as they came nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as if his heart would break. She pitied him deeply. ‘What is his sorrow?’ she asked the Gryphon, and the Gryphon answered, very nearly in the same words as before, ‘It’s all his fancy, that: he hasn’t got no sorrow, you know. Come on!’

So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who looked at them with large eyes full of tears, but said nothing.

‘This here young lady,’ said the Gryphon, ‘she wants for to know your history, she do.’

‘I’ll tell it her,’ said the Mock Turtle in a deep, hollow tone: ‘sit down, both of you, and don’t speak a word till I’ve finished.’

So they sat down, and nobody spoke for some minutes. Alice thought to herself, ‘I don’t see how he can even finish, if he doesn’t begin.’ But she waited patiently.

‘Once,’ said the Mock Turtle at last, with a deep sigh, ‘I was a real Turtle.’

--Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

All I learned from the EIG Stitch & Bitch on Monday is that Bill Butler appears to be a real downer. Could he come up with a more curmudgeonly reason for not allowing Daryl Katz into the meeting? Or give a more evasive answer about a second ownership bid and a potential conflict of interest? Yikes. Smile, guy. Plus, dude wears mock turtlenecks under his suit jacket. For this reason alone I find him unsuitable for ownership. People who wear mock turtlenecks under suit jackets--no, with anything--scare me. It's especially troubling if they are millionaires. What's the excuse, people? Rotary Club pins work on crisp dress shirts too, you know. You know who wears mock turtlenecks? Scott Boras. Enough said. No. I just can't get behind that. No. I'm sorry. I can't do it. I won't do it. No. Stop it already. No.

In other news, top prospect and Edmonton native Tyler Ennis was just on Global Sports, talking about how excited he was to play "in this building" on Wednesday. He couldn't have meant Literally Crush, could he? What the hell is so special about that building? Doesn't he know about Candy Mountain, and the move this city is about to make up the Global Urban Food Chain? We're going to be like Columbus, man!!!

And finally, Peter Gammons has an interesting post up on ESPN about sports blogs. You might not be able to see it, as it's behind the ESPN wall (said wall is composed of thousands of men in mock turtlenecks and khakis. Seriously. Look it up). He talks about the changing media landscape, and the value-added sports coverage is getting from non-MSM bloggers. If you can't see it, trust me, it's good. Not great, but good. I especially liked this line at the end: "but as we begin the 2008 season, our information, understanding and thought processes have been dramatically altered from the days when a Sunday newspaper notes column seemed significant. And, as fans, we are so much better off for all the work that is being done." Amen, Peter, amen. Now give me a job.


***Update***
John MacKinnon has his take up on the Mock Turtle.