Like Donkey Kong

[An amalgamation of 400 conversations I've had in the past six months]

Interlocutor: What made you decide to move to Calgary?

Matt: Well, I'm from Calgary originally! I moved away to Lethbridge in 1998; that's where I started my engineering career, met my wife, and we had our three kids. In 2009 I had been working for myself for a few years, and it was time to either get serious by hiring & expanding, or get a job. 

A friend recruited me for a job in Edmonton, and we went for it, and it was great. I'm still with the same firm, and we loved our time up there, but it was never the idea that we'd be there forever. So when the opportunity came up to transfer to Calgary, where all my family is, we went for it.

Interlocutor: So, are you an Oilers fan now?

Matt: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Interlocutor: Ha, so no one managed to convert you, eh?

Matt: Well, it was a steep hill to begin with. Practically the first decision we made after accepting the job was to look for a house in Sherwood Park instead of Edmonton, so that my property taxes wouldn't go towards the Oilers' downtown arena project.

But really: how would they have converted me??? I moved in spring of 2009, and over the next ten years, they had one playoff appearance and four #1 overall draft picks! For every compelling HOPE-style meme, there are five or fifty ludicrous management fails. For every hot highlight of Connor McDavid skating through three guys and scoring, there are a dozen lifeless 3-goal losses. AND SO ON.

And worst of all for me, the moment things start to go actually well -- the team gets some momentum, the coach seems like he knows what he's doing, hey maybe our 3rd line isn't dogshit for once! -- Oilers fans of a certain age start talking like the universe is returning to its proper, natural state. The whining by younger fans that McDavid & Draisaitl don't get enough respect from eastern media, even though that's laughably false, seems practically refreshing in comparison.

Interlocutor: [pause] Looks like rain...

Matt: Yeah, so even though I'm nowhere near as engaged as I once was, I'm still a Flames fan. 

Interlocutor: Good luck with the move!

Matt: Thanks! Go Flames.